How to create an intimate atmosphere in your wedding venue with understated decor, for introverted couples

The wedding industry can feel really loud sometimes especially on social media, and from where I'm standing it often feels like couples are being told over and over again that bigger is better. You may often hear things like this " You need a wow factor when your guests walk in" , "You need a statement piece" and "You need a focal point"

~

And I'm a little tired of hearing it to be completely honest and I wish more wedding stylists & florists in the wedding industry would talk more about other alternatives too, because not all couples feel like these things are important to them. All of the couples I've ever chatted to on design calls and at wedding fairs, aren't aiming for 'over the top' decorations to help them style their space.

~

They're not looking for showy, over dressed decor, instead they care more about creating a comfortable experience for their guests and a space they can feel themselves in. They care more about the atmosphere and energy in the room, and they know the aesthetics are a big piece of the puzzle, that's going to help them achieve that. But they're not interested in impressing anyone with how much money they have spent on big statements. They are focussed more on creating something special, that is a real expression of their relationship.

~

If this sounds like a bit of you and you're wondering how you can create a more intimate atmosphere in your wedding venue with understated decor that doesn't have to have your guests shouting 'wow' at every turn, you will love what I'm chatting about today.

Why smaller wedding venues have the edge on intimacy

What I will say after some experience of decorating a combination of small and large wedding venues over the last few years, since 2020 as a wedding stylist, is that the more open the space is, like a marquee, the more you will have to work hard and go large with your decorations to actually make an impact in the space. It's really hard to make a completely white open space look well decorated, and I have found that you need to seriously throw money at it to make a difference.

~

 You not only have to break up all the white walls, you also need to think about ceiling decor, to bring the height down to an intimate level. If you're trying to achieve an intimate vibe, then I advise avoiding choosing a large venue space, as it will be really hard for you to create this type of atmosphere. I have styled a marquee for a wedding open day and for one of my couples, and I can tell you the pressure is much higher, because the worst fear, becomes about the space not feeling decorated enough. Every conversation I had with the bride about the decor was to do with size, which meant we were losing focus on the couple. It becomes more about the venue itself!

~

Tipis like Scrivelsby Walled Garden in Lincolnshire and rustic wedding barns have the edge on intimacy as they naturally feel cosy to start with. Creating an intimate mood is more achievable with decorations that feel homely, romantic and inviting. Venues like this are often hidden gems that are tucked away where you have a private setting all to yourself, feeling personal for your small scale guest list. So choosing an enchanted garden, a private courtyard or a botanical nook to have your wedding at, will give you all the intimate vibes you could ever want. 

Let's normalise creating an understated look that feels natural over the pressure of needing a 'wow factor'

Now let's nip this in the bud, you don't need 'wow factor' wedding decor. The pressure to amaze your guests with a jaw dropping moment will just suck all the enjoyment out of choosing decorations. You're tying the knot, that's wow enough! Lol! Honestly the pressure on couples these days is so intense. Please don't succumb to the pressure of trying to outdo your friends wedding with extravagant displays, or to show a masterpiece on your social media page, you'll blow the budget for starters, but more importantly it won't make you have a better day.

~

You'll be wiser to put your energy and money into a design that's full of meaning. Understated decor has a 'less is more' approach, with details that have been intentional chosen and which have a quiet luxury about them. This kind of aesthetic will elevate the venues natural beauty as the colour scheme and decor choices will have been carefully considered. This is the approach I take with my wedding styling and I focus on story telling through the aesthetics. My packages are perfect for couples who care more about making their design personal. You can read more about my styling services here. 

Natural flower arrangements over structured floral centrepieces

I have never really been a fan of structured floral arrangements that look formal, they are way too stuffy looking for me, which is why I never had any flowers for my own wedding day, as this was the only option available at the time. I much prefer a 'garden gathered look' and 'meadow styles' that provide a natural flowing vibe.

~

Incorporating wild grasses which add delicate movement and scented herbs like lavender and rosemary, will also add a sensory experience for guests. I think this style of flower arranging is perfect for couples looking for an effortless organic look to their styling with wild flowers freshly picked from the garden. It makes the setting feel relaxed and guests will feel comfortable dining and chatting amongst the natural surroundings. I offer this style of flower arranging when couples chose to work with me on styling their venue. You can find some of my floral work here.

Thoughtful intentional wedding decorations over repeated & mass produced

If you're looking for something less traditional with your wedding decor, you'll definitely want to steer clear of decor on repeat. I'm referring mostly to those table centrepieces you see that look identical to each other on all the tables. To me it looks really dated, and it can look like a wedding from the 90's. Using mass produced decorations can give your wedding decor a sterile look and lack any kind of personality.

~

The last thing you want is for it to feel like a corporate event! I prefer a less structured look, and advise all my couples to create a warm, lived in look by using a mix and match approach using one of a kind pieces. Vintage and recycled treasures are perfect for this as they instantly have a story and tons of character about them. This kind of relaxed style is suitable for rustic barns and garden weddings, as it works in harmony with the surroundings. I have a lovely collection of decor in my catalogue here, which you can hire for your wedding.

 Story driven wedding design with personality over the current wedding trends

While it can be really fascinating to learn about the current wedding trends for your wedding year when you start planning, I would urge caution on using them in your wedding design, as you may quickly fall out of love with them when every one wants it for their wedding, making it quickly overdone. 

~

I think it's much better to create a wedding design that has your love story and relationship at the heart of it. When you choose decorations for your aesthetics based on your passions, values, lifestyle and include your personal stories, you won't be tempted to change your mind if you see a shiny new wedding trend, as you are creating something real, not based on a new fad!

~

When you add your personalities & relationship throughout your design details, giving your guests clues to what you're all about, you'll create a more intimate connection with your guests that's helps them learn about you on the day. This is way more important then having 'the latest thing.' This is what I specialise in when it comes to designing for my couples when I work with them inside my wedding packages.

~

You may also like to read a blog post all about making your design more personal, there's some great tips in it for helping you create a design that feel authentic to you. You can find it here.

I created bespoke menus and name tags for this styled shoot which really makes the look personal. Each place setting creates an intimate moment for guests as they sit down to enjoy the evening reception. If you would like table stationery making, to compliment your look and make it feel extra special for each guests you can read more about my bespoke stationery service here.

Couple Review ~ Brooke & Ben

" We met Rea at a wedding open day, not really knowing what we wanted. Rea's wedding stationery was so beautiful and really captured our attention. With Rea's help and advice, we ended up with some beautiful pieces that set the tone for the rest of our wedding. She made the whole planning so enjoyable and stress-free. I would recommend Rea in a heartbeat!"

~

Comfortable intimate spaces that create connection over granduer & showy

Guests are there to celebrate the both of you, and are more bothered about being comfortable as they dine, instead of the huge statement installation hovering over their head. Guests want to feel relaxed, they don't want to feel like their going to knock something over when they reach for their drink, or a huge centrepiece is blocking their view, stopping them from chatting to auntie dawn! Remember less is more, as thoughtful details that have been chosen and styled intentionally will create a relaxed intimate atmosphere better, over something that's well over dressed and over stylised! 

~

Lots of couples are opting for sharing style wedding breakfast's these days, such as sharing platters and afternoon tea, so the last thing you want is the tables to look and feel overcrowded. Instead of large centrepieces, it's better to use a collection of bud vases so you can dot them about or group in small clusters, leaving room for serving dishes or wooden boards of food to be placed on the table. 

~

I hope you have found this topic interesting and I really hope you feel less pressured to create the wow factor in your wedding venue. It's just not necessary. If you would love some help choosing thoughtful pieces to help you style your space, you can take a look at my wedding table decor packages here and my wedding ceremony scenes here.

Photos captured by the lovely The Jasmine Cottage Studio for my styled shoot  I organised which you can find here at Scrivelsby Walled Garden 

~ 

This styled shoot was also featured on the English Wedding Blog as I wrote a blog post all about how your wedding styling and aesthetics have the power to create an atmosphere. You can read the article here

Couple Jemma & Kyle

"We wanted our wedding to showcase everything that we stand by, being outdoorsy, farmer-y and incredibly relaxed. Oh my goodness did Rea deliver. From the dried wildflowers on the tablescapes to the bespoke table plan, it honestly couldn't of looked any better than it did. We owe Rea everything, and we will always be thankful that she helped our visions come true. "